This is the generation that will abolish abortion

When my son died five years ago today, I was told “It was just a miscarriage.” No! Benjamin is my son.

I share this story every year because it is important for people to understand the humanity of every child and the importance of protecting and respecting all human life, born and pre-born.

On the morning of February 23, 2011 I awoke to the scream of my wife coming from the bathroom down the hall. I jumped out of bed and ran to her, finding her standing next to the toilet bleeding. In tears she pointed to the toilet where the body of my son (approximately 12 weeks into his development) was floating.

I stood in shock for a moment as we did not even know we were pregnant; the test we took weeks earlier came up negative. Then I noticed my wife was not steady and she was bleeding badly. I wrapped a towel around her to stop the bleeding and scooped my son’s body out of the toilet. I then loaded my wife into the van, as I knew driving her to the hospital would be faster than waiting for an ambulance.

When we arrived in the emergency room the attending doctor immediately called for a specialist, as he could not stop the bleeding; there was blood literally on the walls and floor. As the specialist came into the room he looked up and said, “Oh my God; is that her blood pressure?”  My heart stopped.  I have to say that was the scariest moment of my entire life as I thought for a moment I might lose my wife.

The doctor was able to stop the bleeding and my wife was stabilized. The doctor pointed to the container holding our son and said her would “take care of that.”  I told him, “No, we are going to have a funeral.” The hospital actually treated us extremely well.  They were very sensitive to our loss; I was surprised.

I called the pastor of the church we were attending at the time to tell him what happened and ask about a funeral service for our son. He did not know what to do as he had never had a funeral for a child who was miscarried.  I ended up doing all of the legwork and making the arrangements myself

That Sunday as the pastor was announcing the funeral, I was shocked when he stopped mid-announcement to make a disclaimer. He mentioned that many women in the church had gone through a miscarriage but had not chosen to have a funeral and that it was “no big deal.”  “This is just something the Kempers chose to do.” I was appalled; I could not believe that this was being said as I sat there days after the death of my child, hearing how it was “no big deal.”

That Tuesday at the funeral, other than the Pastor, his wife, intern and one another couple, no one else from our church showed up to the funeral. I remember standing near the graveside wondering why no one was there; none of the elders and most of the deacons did not come.

Later when I called the pastor and asked him why no one else showed up, he said that people did not really knew my son. I replied, “But they know my family.” I then asked him if this had been his son or any other grown kid in our church, would they have been there?  He replied, “Yes, but this was not any other funeral; it was just a miscarriage.”

“Just a miscarriage.”

I really could not believe my ears; did he really just say that about my son? Mind you, this is a very pro-life church. This is a church which supported the work I do and even financially gave to this pro-life work. How could a pastor who was so pro-life say something like this?

The answer is simple. Even those who call themselves Christian or pro-life sometimes cannot 100% understand the full humanity, the full personhood of the child inside the womb. If we did, abortion would be over.

We still see some kind of difference between the children in the womb and the children running around the streets today. We still are more emotionally distraught over the shootings in a school then the dismemberments in abortion clinics. We have not actually seen abortion for what it truly is.

I will concede two differences between the children in the womb and the children running around today. First difference is their age, what stage of life development they are in. Zygote, Embryo, Fetus, Infant, Toddler, Teen, Adult…. These are all stages of the life of a human person.

The second difference is why I am writing this story, the reason I have given more than 20 years of my life to fighting for the abolishment of abortion. It is their voice. The children in the womb have no voice; they are in need of someone to do as Proverbs 24:11 commands us to do: Rescue those who are being taken away to death; hold back those who are stumbling to the slaughter.

When those who call themselves followers of Christ, Christians, begin to recognize that abortion is actually an act of homicide, the abolition of abortion will take place. When we show the same rage and intolerance that we have for things like child molestation, rape, school shootings or any other crime against humanity, we will end this holocaust that is now over 42 years running in America.

My wife and I sat down with our other children and looked at our son’s body and asked them to name him. We chose Benjamin Davis Kemper. Benjamin Davis Kemper is as much my child as any of our living children. Benjamin Davis is buried in a cemetery in Troy, OH where he was given the dignity he deserved with a funeral and burial.

Today, February 23rd I will visit that gravesite and mourn the loss of our son. I will look to heaven and know that he is with Christ, waiting for our family reunion one day.

While I stand at his gravesite I know I will also be reminded of the 55 million gravesites that don’t exist for all those whose lives have been stolen by surgical abortion. I will shed a tear for my nation, a nation which has turned her back on the most innocent and venerable of her citizens. I will also renew my commitment to shining the light of Christ and truth on the evil of our age, the abortion holocaust.

Will you join me in this commitment? Will you Stand True?

Bryan Kemper

I know the pain that comes with losing my son, I cannot imagine the pain someone must feel after an abortion. I am blessed to work with some amazing people who are leading the way in helping to heal the pain from shockwaves of abortion. Please visit abortionshockwaves.com for more information about healing.

Stand True relies on the support of people like you to continue fighting to save lives. Please donate $25, $50, $100, $500 or any amount and help Stand True continue to educate, activate and equip this generation. If you can donate please do so at https://give.cornerstone.cc/Stand+True or on the donate button at the top of this page.

6 Comments

  1. David E Dowd
    Posted February 23, 2016 at 1:57 pm | Permalink

    Dear Bryan and your dear family,

    Such a beautiful tribute to Benjamen. Touching me in a particular way for my dad named me for his little brothers David and Edward who did not survive infancy.

    As a culture, we so need to acknowledge life in the womb.

    In the course of your research and discussions, have you come across the commentary of John Paul II in the Gospel of Life or Father John Hardon SJ (RIP) on the matter of the eternal destiny of the soul of the child. For, doesn’t our dignity come from the existence of our soul?

    Thank you so much for your love, your compassion and your eloquence in focusing our attention on the mighty gift of human life in the womb. May you and Mrs Kemper and your family be comforted in sharing this sorrow by our Blessed Mother!

    Under the mercy,

    Dave Dowd

  2. Lauren Kretzer
    Posted February 23, 2016 at 2:46 pm | Permalink

    This was so beautifully written. I am so sorry for the loss to you and your family.

  3. Tonia McBride
    Posted February 23, 2016 at 3:11 pm | Permalink

    Bless you and your family for having the courage to love a child you never knew when he was alive. Every child deserves to be loved and every person who dies deserves to be mourned. One of the greatest tragedies of abortion is our attempt to deny not just the humanity, but the mere existence of millions of children. They never get fair representation in the discussion because they aren’t around to stand up for themselves. It is our duty as advocates of justice to speak for them.

  4. June Vendetti
    Posted February 23, 2016 at 3:34 pm | Permalink

    Dear Bryan, Thank you for sharing your story. I agree with you 100%! Every life is valuable, no matter the age of that life. It is human, from the moment of conception to the natural ending of death. People just don’t get it. Miscarriage means the infant was born too soon, but it is still a baby, and it still needs to be treated as such. A woman just approached me about my views on abortion. I told her I’m against it; there’s no medical reason to ever have an abortion. She loves Planned Parenthood, while I despise what they do. I invited her to a Rachel’s Vineyard Retreat, because I think she’s had an abortion, but won’t admit it to me. I’m hoping that she will change her mind and have a conversion of heart. I will pray for you and your wife, that someday, God will send another child to you. June

  5. Lydia Grace
    Posted February 24, 2016 at 11:54 pm | Permalink

    I’m so sorry for your family’s loss.

    Thank you for posting this and talking about this. This is very powerful and so true. I remember being really confused as a young teen when my best friend’s mom miscarried her little sister. No one talked about it much, there was no funeral, and the kid seemed quickly forgotten about. (I seriously doubt her family forgot, but it felt like everyone else did since none of us talked about it after a few days and, whether we wanted to or not, even as a kid I felt the social idea that it was “just” a miscarriage and not something to go on about.) I had been involved in the pro-life movement for a couple years at that point, but that was the first time I really realized how hard it is for people to see the full humanity of the unborn. If the child had just been a bit older, such as a newborn, people would have mourned openly, I think.

  6. Lana : 15 years old
    Posted March 2, 2016 at 11:25 am | Permalink

    I am still very young, but I still cannot comprehend in my lifetime why the thought of abortion exists. Right now, what I can do is stop thinking about all that for one moment and think about your little boy. Even though his life on earth has come to an end, I know and would bet MY ENTIRE LIFE AND WOULD DIE FOR THIS BET IM MAKING, that your little baby boy is beside god right now where he will spend eternity in gods arms and feel protected for the rest of time and forever on. When I think about it, death is a tragic and painful and heartbreaking thing, but what I try to focus on is that after all those cruel Abortions and tragic miscarriages that happen, every single one of those babies is in gods arms now. I will pray for you family and know that Benjamin is in good hands. He must have been a beautiful baby, and I look forward and hope I’m able to meet his and others spirits when I visit the God and stand before him. Bless you and your family.

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