This is the generation that will abolish abortion

Tough Questions – I Went To Pray at an Abortion Clinic and People Were Screaming and Yelling. How Should We Reach Out To Women Considering Abortion?

I am often asked what people should say to a woman who is considering abortion.  I wish there was a magic answer that I could give that would help change the mind of every woman thinking about aborting their baby, but there is not.

When answering this question you also have to address what not to say.  I have stood outside abortion mills for over 13 years praying, protesting, and have even been arrested many times for praying in front of the doors.  I have watched thousands of women walk into abortion mills and have seen many different approaches by pro-lifers trying to save the babies.

The first mistake I see is anger. Pro-lifers can become so angry about abortion that they sometimes take it out on the women and just scare them right into the abortion mill.  I have heard people call women murderers, whores, Jezebels, devil worshipers, and so much more.  I have seen anti-abortion protesters so angry that they actually spit while they scream at people.  I have never once seen this kind of behavior convince a women to stop and talk and change her mind.

I will admit that in the early years I used to scream and wave signs in people’s faces.  I let the frustration get to me as I watched these many young girls being taken into the abortion mill by their parents or boyfriends.  I would see the boyfriends leave and go to get food, sit in the parking lot and eat and smoke while their child was being killed inside that building.  I let the frustration get to me and began to rely on myself for results instead of relying on God.

I want to make it clear that not all people that go to abortion mills to minister and pray act like this. We at Stand True highly encourage people to go to the abortion mills for prayer and witnessing.  There are highly effective ways of reaching women and helping them to make the right decision.

When a woman is going to an abortion mill she is usually scared and frustrated.  She believes there is no other option for her other than abortion and there is no one to help her.  These girls do not need someone yelling at them and telling them how evil they are, they need someone to love them and let them know how precious they are in God’s eyes.  They need someone to address their needs, not just the baby’s needs.  They need someone to approach them in the same way Christ would approach someone who was hurting and scared and about to make a huge mistake.

The first thing we tell people if they are going to try to talk to girls entering abortion mills is to not be holding a sign or wearing pro-life messages on their shirts.  You should be dressed very friendly so you won’t immediately scare the women away.  We believe the first words to a woman entering the mill should be geared towards her and how she is doing, not just about the baby. Let her know you care about her.

The most powerful thing you can do when going to the abortion mill is pray. There is nothing more effective than prayer.  When we go to our local abortion mill we spend the first hour as a group reading the Bible out loud, not shouting, but just reading out loud the Word of God.  We then walk around the building praying for the women, the doctor, the nurses, the escorts, and everyone involved.  We also look for opportunities to witness and share, not only with the women going in, but with the escorts and whoever is around.  Not calling them names or condemning them to hell, but sharing Christ’s love with them.

These ideas and principles are not just for the abortion mill, but for our everyday life when we run into situations like this.  I recently read an article about a young girl at a Catholic school who got pregnant and was told she could not walk the stage at her graduation, while the young man was allowed to.  Not only was this total hypocrisy, but it was a dangerous way to treat this young girl.  It is exactly that kind of reaction and treatment of girls that drive them to abortion.

Our words, especially our first words to a girl who gets pregnant can determine the path she takes and be the difference between life and death.  As a father of three daughters I do wonder how I would react if one of my daughters came home one day and told me she was pregnant.  What would I say?  Would I blow up and lose my temper? Or would I love her no matter what mistake she made?

When we go to God in prayer and confess our sins, do you think He screams and yells and has a huge fit?  I don’t think so.  Do you think he yells at us and tells us how horrible we are, and how much of a disgrace we are to the family?  I don’t think so.  When we go to Him, He is faithful to love and forgive us.  I pray that I never have to go through this with my daughters, but if I do, I pray that my first words to her are those of love.

Yes, we do believe that abortion is the act of killing a human person and can never be permitted.  Yes, we believe that abortion is a sin and is detestable in God’s eyes.  Yes, we believe that we need to stand up against this evil and be there to try to help people from making such a tragic and horrific mistake.  But more importantly than all of that, we believe those people need Christ and we need to love them as Christ would.

1 John 1:9 “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”


  1. nancy lawler
    Posted March 9, 2012 at 8:19 am | Permalink

    Amen very well said..thank you….I share your same views ….God is love!

  2. Isabel S.
    Posted May 30, 2012 at 12:10 am | Permalink

    They are not “abortion mills”. They’re clinics.

  3. Isabel S.
    Posted May 30, 2012 at 12:13 am | Permalink

    Honestly, the idea of going up to a woman who’s about to have an abortion and trying to confuse her by claiming that God loves her and therefore she shouldn’t kill her baby and should take care of something she doesn’t want in the first place really disturbs me. Yes, this disturbs me more than an actual abortion itself. It’s really one of the most psychologically twisted, messed-up things you can do to a woman. Anyone who does this ought to be ashamed of themself.

  4. faye
    Posted May 31, 2012 at 2:42 am | Permalink

    @ Isabel regardless of what one belief is the facts are facts Having an abortion is killing someone. They are alive even though that fetus needs it’s mother right now to survive doesn’t make it less alive. Don’t we all need someone to nurture us when we are first born does that make us less human. I do agree if someone is not a Christian and is walking into an Abortion clinic then those views might now mean much to that particular person and yes they would most likely continue with their plan. What would be interesting, however, is to hear how you think someone should try and convince another women into not having an abortion.

  5. Jerry
    Posted January 17, 2013 at 3:12 am | Permalink

    Isabel, they are abortion mills, they abort and rip babies into little pieces. You say you are disturbed that some actually care enough about innocent unborn babies to attempt to save their lives, and that they should be ashamed of themselves, really? Hmm, wonder if the God who says He formed us in the womb would agree with you on that? There seems to be a lot of anger in your comments, why?

  6. jaimi
    Posted December 13, 2013 at 7:38 pm | Permalink

    I had an idea about how to reach out to girls before they get into a place wear homicide is legal. What if we built a place right next to the clinic in view to girls walking in there. This place would have huge signs. Huge screens playing videos and slideshows of some awesome prolife posters I have been seeing here on facebook :

  7. nunya
    Posted March 26, 2014 at 12:13 pm | Permalink

    Do you eat meat?

  8. Margo
    Posted May 13, 2014 at 4:22 am | Permalink

    Are you helping the women afterwards financially? Are you also protesting the death sentence for criminals, if every life is precious? Are you also campaining infront of gun stores? Are you campaining for better sex education at schools so that teens learn how to have safe sex before it even comes to unwanted pregnancies? Are you guys adopting children out of foster care? If not you are simply hypocrites which get a high out of attacking women that are already in a very bad place.

    You are doing it to feel holier then them, while ignoring all the problems that lead up to it. There is no choice of having abortions available or not there is only the choice of having safe abortions or not. Studys show that people don’t let themself be stopped by the fact that abortions are illegal they just go and get it done under dangerous conditions.
    If you would really care about people you would help unadopted children and educate people to prevent unwanted pregnancies through education.

  9. Hayley
    Posted January 19, 2015 at 8:42 pm | Permalink

    What I have found thus far is that people who are pro-life are very very very angry people. It makes me sick to the stomach. They say the most horrible things to the very thing they claim they are trying to protect – life itself!
    To those who are pro-life – instead of spending your time criticizing others, why don’t you do something productive with your time like – offering support to mothers during and after pregnancy so they are better equipped to bring a baby into this world. One of the reasons why women opt to abort is that they do not have the support they need to raise a child i.e. financial, emotional, psychological etc. I’m sure god would prefer you to be doing something worthwhile with your time instead of bullying/manipulating others.

    • patty
      Posted April 22, 2016 at 1:39 am | Permalink

      I got pregnant and also was scared/too broke to afford baby. But still that is no excuse to commit murder so its got to take a special kind of heartless selfishness to go through with such a horrendous act. Honestly id rather kill myself before killing my baby.

  10. patty
    Posted April 22, 2016 at 1:35 am | Permalink

    I just don’t understand it thinking about abortion breaks my heart makes me cry I can’t take that our country has slaughtered almost 60 million innocents. This makes me sick. I’m going to go stand in front of the local planned parenthood tomorrow cause I don’t know what else to do.

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